"The Facebook thing:
I wish I had known what to expect with that, it wouldn't have been so upsetting, for either of us, I suspect. I completely understand the unfriending of your close ties. You really do need to separate and focus. The last thing you need is to waste time on watching the drivel that comes through the average Facebook news feed, even from someone as pithy as me. I hope I can still send you a financial message that way, from time to time (just deposited $50 in your bank account, more when I get paid next week). But if not, ok. I am happy to be able to email you once a week, and send you snail mail on occasion. Most kids would be really happy for an excuse to unfriend their mom on Facebook, haha! Presumably, I can still follow you on Facebook and see what you decide to post (Nathan Hall). Please tell me what your rules and guidelines are regarding Facebook, etc. I had planned to work on your blog this weekend and am wondering how to post links on your Facebook timeline if I am not your friend (sounds so harsh!). I realize that I have your passwords and can log in and post as you, but I don't want to break rules on your behalf. So please advise."
"The Arrival in CA:
So you probably already know that I called the mission home the day you arrived and talked to (I think) the mission president's wife (she kept saying everything so fast, and it sounded like there was so much going on there, it was hard to keep up). I understand there was more confusion down there about where you were supposed to be going and if your visa had really arrived after all. She said they had been told that you weren't going to California after all, had flown directly to Spain, and that they had already crossed you off their list of arrivals and were pretty surprised when you showed up. Let me just say: HOLY CRAP! What a crazy mess to fly into, just ripped from the loving arms of your family and friends. What doubts must be going through your head about where you should be..... Don't let them. You are where you are supposed to be, Nephi. Weather the storms. You are not alone."
"The Perfect Missionary...
...doesn't exist. Not anymore than the perfect mom, or perfect girlfriend (no matter what you might think), or the perfect husband (I have some experience in this area), or perfect wife or perfect anyone. And I know that we all know that, and say the words and nod our heads, but it doesn't keep Satan from telling us that we really COULD be that perfect thing, if only we didn't suck so bad, making it all so pointless to try. I heard you say something to Kalli about deciding early on that you weren't going to be the best violin player in the fifth grade, so you made a hasty exit. Joking or not, it made me wonder if there is some basis in that for your Barbie thing, your competitive nature, your choices. Some days you WILL be a Perfect Missionary, but I imagine they will be hard won, and few and far between. More often, you will probably be Darned Good Missionary, or OK Missionary, or Better Missionary If I Had A Fountain Drink, or Cranky Missionary, or sometimes Lazy And Just Leave Me Alone Missionary. Or Homesick Missionary. There's a lot of those.
Do the right things so that you can reclaim your desire to serve. One way or another, this is all going to change your life. Man up and tough out the tough times, you will not only enjoy the respect and admiration of everyone, but you will gain the respect for yourself and your ability to do what needs to be done. We need the blessings that will come from this, ALL of us. Your future is so bright, and you are meant to do amazing things. Focus, pray.
Write back soon, and tell me:
10 things that are bad;
10 things that are good;
10 things that don't matter.
I love you,
Being away from home
Being away from Kalli
Waking up at 6:30 every morning
People who won't accept the gospel
10 things that are good:
Being in the comfort of my home
Being around family
Being with the love of my life
The gospel of Jesus Christ
The Book of Mormon
Kalli Sage Kovac
Can't think of much more...
10 things that don't matter:
Don't know what to say. Oh wait... it doesn't matter....
"No! I wanted 10 things that are good THERE! Not here. It's an exercise. Give it some thought."
I'll give thought to all of the ten things throughout the week and I will jot them down and send them back to you next week.
Sent from my iPad